no title. just vibes.

What’s up, you gorgeous goobers?!

So, i wake up yesterday, shaking off a massive bangover (yes, that’s bangover, not hangover. IYKYK) and i check my phone to find a mysterious email. Imagine dealing with shit before you’ve even had a sugar-free Monster.

The email in question-

OFFICIAL NOTICE OF CESSATION AND DESISTANCE

From the Desk of Maxwell T. Orderly, Esq. Office of Corporate Harmony & Behavioral Compliance

1234 Uniformity Lane, Suite 0

Harmonyville, USA 00000

Date: 8/11/2025

To: Operator of emmiedoom.com

RE: Unauthorized and Unregulated Fun

Dear Ms. Doom (if that is indeed your real name),

It has come to my attention, via multiple concerned citizens and one extremely agitated mall cop, that your website “emmiedoom.com” is engaging in the blatant distribution of unapproved whimsy, unsanctioned glitter usage, and other forms of chaotic public influence.

These activities are in direct violation of the Uniform Order Act of 1973, Subsection 4(b), which clearly states: “No person shall willfully engage in joy-making, bedazzling, or cupcake-smashing without the express written consent of the Department of Order.”

Your so-called “merchandise” line (“Candy Violence”) and your musical releases are particularly concerning, as they encourage free thought, nonconformity, and the wearing of colors outside the approved gray-and-beige spectrum. Furthermore, your stated opposition to “capitalism, authority, banality, and the idea of being ‘normal’” is a direct affront to the Core Values of Order™.

Therefore, I must demand the immediate shutdown of “emmiedoom.com” and the removal of all associated social media accounts within 72 hours of receipt of this notice. Failure to comply will result in the following:

1. Formal reprimand in the Orderly Gazette.

2. *Revocation of glitter privileges.

3. Mandatory enrollment in a six-week “Smile Neutrally” seminar.

This is your one and only warning. Please govern yourself accordingly.

Yours in Uniformity,

Maxwell T. Orderly, Esq. Director, Corporate Harmony & Behavioral Compliance

Like, seriously? Wtf is this shit? I tried looking this guy up, but i couldn’t find anything. Tbh i’m not too worried about it. I’ma keep doing my thing. I’ve got some silly shit coming down the pipe. I’m currently working on a cover of one of the greatest songs ever written. I’m hoping to get it recorded and mixed within the next couple of weeks. And it’s gonna go HARD. AAAAAAAnd we are currently hard at work planning the very first gig for Dr Emmie’s Traveling Roadshow. The current pace is kind of a crawl, but things are happening. And keep an eye out for some more merch dropping soon. There’s one more design in the Candy Violence line that we still need to finish and we’ve got stickers on the way. For now, i need to go help Mo-Mo clean the Party Pit. idk whose idea it was to duct tape PB&J sandwiches to the ceiling, but it was fucking genius XD

Ttys <3

Oh, and if you’re reading this, Maxwell, you can kiss my glorious, candy-coated ass. The fun will never be stopped XP